Shhhh! Let me tell you a secret – tomorrow is a holiday o. Please don’t tell anybody. The worst mistake to make in life is to tell someone a secret and reminding the person not to tell anybody.
The person will only take it as a reminder to shout! Even you the one telling the person not to tell anyone, you are dangerous. You might have told someone already…unconsciously often with no mischief in mind but the implications may be some way! Don’t trust yourself too much. Sometimes we forget ourselves especially those of us with okro mouths.
I can’t wait to have a prolonged sleep tomorrow. Waking up to prepare for work every day for 5 days can be stressful. We thank Allah for tomorrow’s holiday so we can rest small. Dr. Rafique Daudi (PhD), CEO of Metropolitan Life, Health and Pensions, please you owe me Ramadan meat tomorrow, Sir.
I want the one that contains less fat. As we are aging, they say we should not eat too much of fatty food and meat. We should also eat early but how do we do that as corporate people when we leave home so early for work and close so late?
The solution is what many of us have devised. Because we don’t want to eat in the night as we risk health factors, when we close from work, we go to the nearest chopbar or restaurant to eat before it gets late.
I have observed on many occasions that anytime I find myself at the chopbar after work, I see a lot of men with wedding rings who are also there eating. Don’t we have wives at home? We are married but we are still bachelors all in the name of avoiding potbellies. Sometimes the stress of avoiding overweight actually adds more weight to our weight! I don’t know why.
The irony of life can be very ironic. At the time I liked meat and milk so much, I couldn’t afford it. Now that by God’s grace I can afford it, they say ‘cholesterol’ so I shouldn’t eat. What should I do again? I am beginning to be tempted to free my mind and eat anything though there are some things we don’t eat with our mouths.
It is not what you are thinking o! For those ones, I will use ‘rubber’. The risk level is super high now; the numbers are increasing and I have become more careful but if it has to do with what I will eat with my mouth, anything goes, I am tired.
For the ‘married bachelors’ who do not eat dinner prepared by their wives because we get home late, tomorrow is a fine opportunity to eat dinner that would be prepared tonight, in the morning of Friday, the holiday. To be continued.
Sometimes too we become ‘married bachelors’ because some of us will be in bed with our wives and can’t access their ‘wi-fi’,. When that happens, we are tempted to go out to eat without our mouths especially after work. Some of our wives, please ‘open up’ for us o, or else, the ring may be on our fingers but it may push us into the category of ‘married bachelors’. Sometimes even though some of our wives do the ‘opening ceremony’ religiously, some of us would still go out to eat without our mouths. Please help us to reduce the ‘outside eating’ especially the ones without using our mouths. You equally stand the risk of infections if we make the mistake of eating without ‘rubber’.
It is because of some of these things that push us men into the following ‘useless hobbies’: Like me, when I am seated in front seat of a trotro bus and there is a space left and I see a beautiful passenger walking into the car, I unconsciously give way for her to sit next to me. When the driver’s mate pushes her into the main cabinet, the way it pains me er. Trotro mate, weytin concern you? Is she your girlfriend? Just allow the person to come sit next to me, you say weytin?
The other one is that you are sitting in the aisles of the trotro seat inside the trotro proper, not front seat. Then a beautiful lady enters and looking for a space to sit and you shift yourself in order to create space for her to sit next to you. As fate would have it, the girl often ignores your unnecessary and unsolicited generosity and dashes straight to sit at the back seat. Weytin concern you? Who send you, Amuzu?
Ehern back to the non-fa about married bachelors.
Married bachelors, are we doing anything wrong? Is it not in the best interest of our families, or? If you can relate, type AMEN! Or else if you have been pushed to that point where you ‘don’t mind the consequences’, remember ‘Sin fascinates and assassinates’!
I met my doctor yesterday at the chopbar and I was shocked to see him eating fufu with plenty goat meat standing as pillars in the fufu bowl. I confronted him. This man told me that I should reduce significantly my intake of red meat as they can damage the nerves of human beings.
I have been complying over one year now. Now see what he himself is doing. In response to my confrontation, he said ‘whatever I advised you to do is in your own interest’. Does it mean the doctor doesn’t have an interest? Ah!
For those of us with unrepentant okro mouths, let’s be careful. You see, those moments when after a call, you say small small negative things about big people, one day they would hear you. Sometimes, we all do it especially when it has to do with a highly reputed person.
I nearly did it to my pastor recently. After hanging up, I failed to check if he had hang up too. Only for me to realise I was still saying small small konkonsa about him to his hearing and unknown to me.
Shhhh! This is a secret; don’t tell my Pastor o! This was what I said but don’t tell him: “This man can worry; he thinks everybody has time like him er!” I heard myself clearly after I had quickly cut the call. As to whether he heard me or not, I feel like asking him whether he has heard anything. Should I? I go explain taya! Hahaaaa!
Have a nice long weekend and remember to talk to God for He is easier to talk to than most people who would only listen to you but will go and do konkonsa about you provided they are not even recording you.
Happy Ramadan to all my Moslem In-Laws especially Mr Shaibu Ali, President of the Insurance Brokers Association of Ghana and the MD of KEK Insurance Brokers. He is one of my In-Laws who does not joke with me at all; so do I!
To the rest of us, go and sin no more….Happy Ramadan!
