By Edith AGBELI
In today’s world, relationships are evolving, but some fundamental truths remain unchanged. One of the most important aspects of a healthy and fulfilling relationship is understanding the balance between masculine and feminine energy.
If you desire a woman’s femininity and submission, you must first create an environment where she feels safe, cherished, and cared for.
For years, we’ve heard pastors, counsellors, and relationship experts emphasize submission, how a woman must submit to a man for a relationship to work. But for some reason, the part about men also submitting is often overlooked or ignored.
Whether we acknowledge it or not, marriage operates under biblical and spiritual principles, especially those found in the Bible and Quran.
Love is one of the most powerful forces in the world, and when it comes to relationships, the Bible provides clear instructions on how men should love, honor, and cherish their wives.
While many discussions about relationships focus on a wife’s submission, the Bible equally emphasizes a husband’s responsibility to love selflessly, honor deeply, and lead with wisdom and humility. Loving her right means following the biblical blueprint that God designed for a strong and fulfilling relationship.
Loving Her as Christ and the Prophet (PBUH) Taught
The foundation of biblical love in marriage is found in Ephesians 5:25, which states:
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
This verse sets an incredibly high standard for love. Christ’s love for the church was sacrificial, unconditional, and enduring. He gave His very life for the church, showing that true love is selfless and devoted. In the same way, men are called to love their wives not just in words but through actions, by being present, patient, kind, and willing to make sacrifices for their well-being.
Similarly, Islam teaches that love in marriage should be filled with mercy and kindness. The Quran beautifully describes the bond between spouses:
“And among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between you. Indeed, in that are signs for people who reflect.” – Quran 30:21
This verse highlights that marriage is meant to be a partnership of peace, love, and mercy. A husband is responsible for ensuring that his wife feels emotionally and spiritually secure, just as he seeks the same in return.
Many men desire respect from their wives, but the biblical principle teaches that respect and submission flourish where love and honor are genuinely expressed. A wife who feels deeply loved is naturally inclined to reciprocate with admiration and support.
Honoring Her as a Precious Partner
Beyond love, the Bible commands husbands to honor their wives.
1 Peter 3:7 says:
“Husbands, in the same way, be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”
This verse does not suggest that women are weak in value or importance. Instead, it acknowledges that they should be treated with special care, just as something precious and valuable is handled with gentleness.
Honor means valuing her opinions, listening to her concerns, supporting her dreams, and showing appreciation. When a husband honors his wife, he strengthens the bond of trust and security in the marriage.
The latter part of the verse also carries a powerful warning—when a husband fails to honor his wife, even his prayers can be hindered. This shows that God takes the way a man treats his wife seriously. A healthy marriage is not just about love between two people but about alignment with God’s will.
By committing to these biblical principles, husbands can ensure that their wives feel cherished, valued, and secure just as God intended. So now let’s see how easy or not easy submission can be.
Women naturally embody femininity when they feel secure emotionally, physically, and even financially. However, when a woman is forced to take on a masculine role, constantly providing for herself and even taking care of you, her natural instincts shift. In this case, she has no choice but to embrace her masculine energy because survival and responsibility demand it.
If a woman is always in a state of providing, decision-making, and leadership—roles traditionally associated with masculinity—how can she embrace her soft, nurturing side? Submission in relationships is not about control or dominance; it is about trust. A woman submits not because she is forced to, but because she feels safe enough to do so.
What Are You Expecting Her to Submit To?
Many men desire a woman who is feminine, soft, and submissive, yet they fail to create the conditions necessary for that energy to thrive.
If she is constantly stressed, carrying the weight of responsibilities that should be shared or shouldered by her partner, submission is not an option—it is a sacrifice. And no woman wants to sacrifice her peace and well-being for a relationship that doesn’t make her feel protected.
If you are not providing emotional stability, financial security, leadership, and love, then what exactly is she submitting to? If she has to fight for herself daily, why would she willingly surrender control?
True masculine energy is about leadership, not dictatorship. A strong man does not demand submission; he inspires it through his actions. He is reliable, responsible, and emotionally intelligent. He understands that a woman flourishes when she feels safe and adored.
When a man provides structure, guidance, and protection, a woman can relax into her natural feminine state. She can be soft, vulnerable, and nurturing because she knows she is taken care of. Feminine energy is like water—it flows effortlessly when it is contained within a strong, stable foundation.
Loving Her the Right Way
Loving a woman the right way means understanding that her femininity is not automatic; it is a response to how she is treated. If she is forced to be strong all the time, she will struggle to be soft. If she is constantly in survival mode, submission will feel unnatural.
To love her right:
- Provide security: Make her feel safe emotionally and physically.
- Be dependable: Show up when you say you will. Keep your word.
- Lead with love: Make decisions with her well-being in mind.
- Respect her efforts: Acknowledge all that she does, and don’t take her for granted.
- Encourage her femininity: Allow her to rest, to express her emotions, and to be soft.
A woman’s femininity and submission are gifts, not obligations. They are given freely to a man who proves himself worthy of them.
If you truly desire a feminine, loving, and devoted partner, then be the kind of man who creates a space where she can thrive. Love her the right way, and she will naturally give you the best version of herself.
Loving her right means embodying the principles of love, honor, and mutual respect as outlined in the Bible. A husband who loves sacrificially, honors sincerely, and leads with wisdom creates a strong and fulfilling relationship.
When men follow God’s design for design for marriage, love flourishes, respect deepens, and the marriage becomes a beautiful reflection of Christ’s love for His church.
Let’s preach the bible in its entirety rather than picking only the parts that comfort us.
The Author is a Risk assessment and cost reduction Strategist, Accountant, relationship coach, writer (Beyond Perfection)
Tel. No: 0244998789
Email: [email protected]
