Hannah is a woman of faith who believes with God all things are possible. So, she can’t seem to wrap her mind around why she’s still childless, six years into marriage. Now Hannah is bitter and angry; and gradually turning cynical, when the unexpected happens one morning, suddenly forcing her to start reassess her whole life.
Hannah halved the curtains and sunshine instantly, streamed into the room. She squinted and stood still for a while, allowing the heat to smoulder her forehead. After some time, she turned around and glanced at the clock on the wall. Seven-fifteen am, it said and then bent over to fold the mat from the tiled floor.
How long had she been doing this? Coming into this room every morning and praying. She didn’t have to answer— she knew the answer. Since she got married six years ago and realized she wasn’t conceiving. If a prophet had told her she would be without a child after all these years, she wouldn’t have believed him.
Why? Because she was Hannah, the one who dedicated herself to God when she was in school, attended every church fellowship, preached to her classmates even when they made fun of her. She even avoided premarital sex because she loved God; she was a friend of God. In fact, she was his child. If he was the one who gave babies, why would he withhold such a blessing from her? After all, he didn’t withhold a good man and a glorious wedding.
Her marriage to George Amankwah six years ago was splendour to behold. It was everything every woman wished for; a huge colourful ceremony, full of life and pride, with friends and family surrounding to enjoy the moment. That day was nothing less than that, and she was the wonder in town; a stunning bride adorned in a beautiful gown, with a husband as handsome as Denzel; tall, dark, well-built and charming. They wonderfully complimented each other and her lasting smiles said it all; she was blessed. God had honoured her for being faithful with him and now she was reaping the benefits of a good work done.
But little did she know the colour was going to start turning grey in her life, soon enough. As much as the couple tried to get pregnant after the wedding, it wasn’t happening, and doctors couldn’t figure out why, because Hannah was a healthy woman with a healthy womb, and could even carry triplets, according to their reports. For the past years, they have been doing everything possible to help the couple; no treatment was too expensive for the Amankwah’s because they were a wealthy family.
George’s father, Robert Amankwah, was one of the first businessmen to set up a fruit processing company in their country and out of that investment, the man managed to set up a bank, an estate and several small businesses. So, finances were not a problem— but as much as the couple tried, all the money they invested into treatments were not getting Hannah pregnant. George had also gone through his share of treatments over time and had been certified healthy by doctors.
Nowadays he was fed-up with all the treatments, and he just wanted things to be as they were. He was a good man who had a beautiful wife he loved; he had great investments he was managing, and kind friends and external family; what more could he ask for. Life must go on. You win some, you lose some.
Someday, they might consider options like adoption which he was open to, or whatever else was in town nowadays. Right now, Hannah wasn’t buying into any of those ideas and he couldn’t and didn’t want to force her. She still wanted to continue trying; medically and faith-wise, and hopefully, have her own children in the near future. She was such a strong, black, sexy woman, and he loved her.
Therefore, all he could do now as a good husband was stand by his wife as she continuously put her faith to the test. Every morning, she woke up early and went to spend time in their prayer room. He joined her three times a week but Hannah was there every day. Sometimes, he wanted to tell her to slow down; but his wife wasn’t the kind who would slow down when she was desperate. And lord knows Hannah was desperate!
Hannah opened the door and George was standing behind it. He was ready for work, dressed in an expensive looking black suit and tie and complimenting shoes. Hannah smiled at him and he looked piercingly into her eyes. He pulled her closer and drowned her full lips into a kiss.
“I’ve told you to stop worrying. If God wants to give us children, he certainly will., and nothing will stop him,” he said from his heart as he continued to look into her eyes.
“It’s been six years George, aren’t you bothered anymore?” Hannah said.
“Of course, I want us to have kids, but six years and so what…? Some people take longer” George said.
“Probably, my mother shouldn’t have named me Hannah.,” she said started to walk away from him.
“Hannah, don’t say that!” he turned around and started following her towards their enormous bedroom where she was heading. She entered and he followed.
“In fact, I’m thinking of changing my name, into something like Rose, Gladys or Abigail. Probably, it might just change my ill fate”
“You are not going to keep talking like that in my presence,” George shut her up, “and you’re not going to change your name. How did you get such an idea into your head? I might as well change mine too.”
“We can figure that out if you want to,” she snapped at him.
“Hannah! Why are you so on edge this morning.?” he screamed at her.
“Because I’m angry! And I’m sad. I didn’t think I’ll come to this point in my life. Why me? Why should I be the one not having my own children. Have we not done everything we should do? Have I not?”
“We are not the only couples struggling to have children. The doctors say we are fine. And there are many couples like us out there.”
“How pathetic! I don’t want to be one of them. I want to have my own children. And I’m also tired of what the doctors have to say anyway…” Hannah continued to snap at George and even though she knew it wasn’t the best thing to do, she couldn’t help herself. She wanted to blame somebody. She wanted another person to take responsibility for her woes and importantly, she wanted to stop feeling sad.
She couldn’t remember the last time she actually smiled from her heart. Her smiles were always mechanic and George knew that too. She kept a clean countenance only to make the two of them look good in the eyes of the world. But there was nothing happy about her grins whenever she showcased them. How on earth could life hand her such a fate? How on earth could God! Did he give her such a glamorous wedding only to make her a laughing stock afterwards? Six years! Six years she had been waiting and praying and it was not an easy thing to do. The gossips that went on behind her; some people even had the guts to taunt her in the face and worst, were those who came with the pity eyes and words. Six years was definitely hard to be married without children.
“I understand what you’re going through. I am in this with you Hannah, together…, and we will do everything you want to do. Whatever test you want us to continue taking. But I don’t want us to destroy what we have going on here because of what we don’t have. We have a great marriage! We have great families. And we love each other…,” George moved closer and nestled her into his arms, “can we at least continue holding on to that? We continue living happily and not let anything distract us? I should mean more than a thousand sons to you!” George said, sweating on his brow now.
“Well, it’s not enough…,” Hannah said softly and untangled herself from his arms, “It’s not enough when I have to face the world as a childless woman every day. It’s not enough when it comes with so much pressure and I wish I could shed off…, and the pity eyes!” Tears began to stream down her face, “I wish people will just stop looking at me like that. I wish I wasn’t the one being looked at like that…, so it’s not enough. I’m glad you love me, and I need it. But it can’t take the place of a thousand sons or daughters”
Isaac is a Journalist and Creative Writer. Isaac is passionate about storytelling and wants to use it to better his society. He recently published a debut Novel, “Saving Rainbow” Read more from Isaac at, www.isaacparbey.com or call/whatapp to buy a book, 024 023 9171. Email: [email protected]