Pseudonym
Became my new name
Other names were tried and tested and discarded
After everything
Semantics
Was my watchword
No single word
Could capture my new world in a word
Was I wild?
Wildly wired?
Unwired?
I was semantically weird
Indifference
Stood in the place of endurance and tolerance
The moment the duo ceased to be pals
The day they decided to walk away from each other
That moment I came to my wit’s end
Hush
Became my new silence
Since the day my voice was confined to the backstage
And droned by drones of louder decibels
Till I could no longer rebel
Toothless
Described me better than
Ruthless
Since my thirty two
Were no longer up to
The only thing left to do
Was to nod in distress
Shrugging
Gave expressions to infinite frustration
And saved me from sighing endlessly
Effortlessly
Groaning
Became the vent for emotional outbursts
When emotional antics
Emotional acrobatics
Reached fever pitch
Incompleteness
Began just the day after
The day my fleshy complement
Ceased to shower real compliments
Saying I was incomplete
Pretence
Was a suitable alibi
Instead of saying a lie
Or bidding goodbye
In my own pretence
In my own mind
I pretended I did not mind
Disguise
Was my eternal hiding place
Always hiding in the shades
And tendering a new face
Never leaving a single trace
To trace my new alleys
Calmness
Put my stress under duress
So stressed up I hid in the boughs of calmness
Still covered in the repressive arms of distress
Still waiting for uncertain success
Subterfuge
Was where I sought refuge
Where I chose to refuse
Where I chose to dispose
Where I refused to choose
Not confused
Shadow
Became the new me
The moment I lost a dignified identity
The moment I teetered from invincibility towards invisibility
Till I was no longer me
